"If I hate my life this much..."

“If I hate my life this much, how much must God hate my life?” This was at the bottom of the page as I sorted through the feelings of my heart. The other night around midnight I found myself sitting with my journal at the dining room table. I was writing out words that seemed to fit my feelings and my emotions about my walk with Christ. Here is the list of words I wrote:
• Dissatisfied
• Disappointed
• Depressed

Now I am not talking about my life with my family, my church or life in general. I am just thinking about how I feel about my relationship to God. In this moment, God reminded me of how he feels about me.

“I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.” John 15:15

“But God demonstrated his own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8

You did not choose me, but I chose you.” John 15:16

Sometimes we may not feel like we are worthy of God’s love and grace. But that doesn’t change God’s love for us. My sin is that I become focused on me rather than on Christ. When I get my eyes off myself and onto him, I am able to accept that God loves me without condition and nothing can ever change that.

I love my life!!!